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<channel>
	<title>The Urban Pastor &#187; Humor</title>
	<atom:link href="http://clarencestowers.com/category/humor/feed/" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml" />
	<link>http://clarencestowers.com</link>
	<description>Your Internet Pastor &#38; Life Coach!</description>
	<lastBuildDate>Fri, 12 Mar 2010 17:38:07 +0000</lastBuildDate>
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		<title>Temptation&#8217;s Trying To Rule Me</title>
		<link>http://clarencestowers.com/2010/03/12/temptations-trying-to-rule-me/</link>
		<comments>http://clarencestowers.com/2010/03/12/temptations-trying-to-rule-me/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 12 Mar 2010 17:34:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>clarencestowers</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Apple/Mac]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Communication]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Computers]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Fun Stuff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Technology]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Tools]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://clarencestowers.com/?p=629</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Today, I received an email from Apple encouraging me to reserve or pre-order my iPad.  Honestly, the more I learn about this device, the more tempted I  become.  I  am beginning to think this could be a game-changer.
Check out this new  ad:

Temptation is real&#8230;
Temptation always appeals to the vulnerable part of  [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p class="dropcap-first">Today, I received an email from<strong> </strong><a href="http://www.apple.com" target="_blank"><strong>Apple</strong><strong> </strong></a>encouraging me to reserve or pre-order my <strong><a href="http://www.apple.com/ipad/" target="_blank">iPad</a></strong>.  Honestly, the more I learn about this device, the more tempted I  become.  I  am beginning to think this could be a game-changer.</p>
<p>Check out this new  ad:</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="400" height="248" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/qiUs8HQu_1o&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1&amp;rel=0" /><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="400" height="248" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/qiUs8HQu_1o&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1&amp;rel=0" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><strong>Temptation is real&#8230;</strong></p>
<p>Temptation always appeals to the vulnerable part of  your heart.  The taste will be palatable, persistent and powerful.</p>
<p>Don&#8217;t believe me, ask Adam &amp; Eve:</p>
<p style="text-align: right;">&#8220;When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it.&#8221; (<a href="http://wwww.youversion.com" target="_blank">Genesis 3:6</a>)</p>
<p>Temptation is&#8230;</p>
<ol>
<li><strong>Enticing </strong>- It appeals to your hopes and desires (I plan to use the iPad to preach &amp; teach&#8230;yea right).</li>
<li><strong>Enjoyable </strong>- It promises you immense pleasure (I can see myself smiling as I use my iPad).</li>
<li><strong>Evasive </strong>- It evades the truth with excuses (My heart is telling my head to find a reason to justify the purchase).</li>
<li><strong>Escalating </strong>- It multiplies your appetite for more (If I don&#8217;t control it now, my desire for more will increase&#8230;darn it).</li>
</ol>
<p>Ok, so did I talk myself out of purchasing one&#8230;to be continued <img src='http://clarencestowers.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_biggrin.gif' alt=':-D' class='wp-smiley' /> </p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><strong>Do you plan to purchase an <a href="http://www.apple.com/ipad/" target="_blank">iPad</a>?  If so, why?  If not, why?</strong></p>
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		<title>The Paradoxical Commandments</title>
		<link>http://clarencestowers.com/2010/02/05/the-paradoxical-commandments/</link>
		<comments>http://clarencestowers.com/2010/02/05/the-paradoxical-commandments/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 05 Feb 2010 15:05:07 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>clarencestowers</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Fun Stuff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Other Stuff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Fun & Humor]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://clarencestowers.com/?p=574</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Here&#8217;s a dose of truth (I call it &#8216;Friday Flavor&#8217;) to start your weekend on the right note.  It&#8217;s the weekend, have fun!
People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
Love them anyway.
If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
Do good anyway.
If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies.
Succeed anyway.


The [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p class="dropcap-first">Here&#8217;s a dose of truth (I call it &#8216;Friday Flavor&#8217;) to start your weekend on the right note.  It&#8217;s the weekend, have fun!</p>
<p>People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.<br />
<strong>Love them anyway.</strong></p>
<p>If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.<br />
<strong>Do good anyway.</strong></p>
<p>If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies.<br />
<strong>Succeed anyway.</strong></p>
<p><strong><a href="http://clarencestowers.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/commandments.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-medium wp-image-575" title="commandments" src="http://clarencestowers.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/commandments-245x300.jpg" alt="" width="245" height="300" /></a><br />
</strong></p>
<p>The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.<br />
<strong>Do good anyway.</strong></p>
<p>Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.<br />
<strong>Be honest and frank anyway.</strong></p>
<p>The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.<br />
<strong>Think big anyway.</strong></p>
<p>People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs.<br />
<strong>Fight for a few underdogs anyway.</strong></p>
<p>What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.<br />
<strong>Build anyway.</strong></p>
<p>People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.<br />
<strong>Help people anyway.</strong></p>
<p>Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth.<br />
<strong>Give the world the best you have anyway.</strong></p>
<p style="text-align: right;">— <a title="Kent Keith’s Web Site" href="http://kentmkeith.com/mother_teresa.html" target="_blank">Kent M. Keith</a>, Speaker and Writer<br />
<a title="Blog Post That Provides the Origin of the Quote" href="http://www.paradoxicalpeople.com/paradoxicalpeople/the_mother_teresa_connection/" target="_blank">Often attributed</a> to Mother Teresa<br />
because she posted them on her wall</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">
<p style="text-align: center;">© 2010, Michael S. Hyatt. All rights reserved. Originally published at <a href="http://michaelhyatt.com/category/resources">http://michaelhyatt.com/category/resources</a></p>
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		<item>
		<title>What Ticks Me Off During Worship</title>
		<link>http://clarencestowers.com/2009/07/13/what-ticks-me-off-during-worship/</link>
		<comments>http://clarencestowers.com/2009/07/13/what-ticks-me-off-during-worship/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 13 Jul 2009 20:12:56 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>clarencestowers</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Church Issues]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Other Stuff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sunday Worship Experience]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://clarencestowers.com/?p=400</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Have you ever been distracted at church even when         you came wanting to worship God? Distractions         during worship can minimize the powerful impact worship can have. We are easily distracted people. Upon further reflection, I&#8217;ve come to believe we [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p class="dropcap-first">Have you ever been distracted at church even when         you came wanting to worship God?<span> </span>Distractions         during worship can minimize the powerful impact worship can have.<span> </span>We are easily distracted people.<span> </span>Upon further reflection, I&#8217;ve come to believe we have a very low tolerance for distractions (including pastors).  Additionally, I&#8217;ve discovered that pastoring a large church presents its fair amount of distractions and challenges.  It has been said that “confession is good for the soul.”  Therefore, it’s confession time for me.</p>
<h2 style="text-align: center;">One of the greatest distractions for me: CELL PHONES.</h2>
<p>Each week during the sermon I hear cell phones ringing.  I wonder how many of these calls have been emergencies?</p>
<h2 style="text-align: center;"><strong>Let me guess &#8211; PROBABLY ZERO!</strong></h2>
<p><strong></strong><img class="aligncenter size-medium wp-image-401" title="iphone" src="http://clarencestowers.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/iphone-300x224.jpg" alt="iphone" width="300" height="224" /></p>
<p>Cell phones are a great tool for communication but please consider how important it is to get that “important” phone call during church, a movie or anything else where the phone can be a horrible distraction to others.  God may speak to you during worship; however, he won’t call you on your cell phone.  <strong>Here are some alternatives; silent/vibrate mode, off button or leave the darn thing in your car. </strong></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><strong><em>While you’re at it go ahead and take the Bluetooth earpiece out of your ear&#8230;<br />
it looks ridiculous during worship.</em></strong></p>
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		<title>Friday Fun&#8230;First Day of School&#8230;Five Years from Now</title>
		<link>http://clarencestowers.com/2009/01/16/friday-funfirst-day-of-schoolfive-years-from-now/</link>
		<comments>http://clarencestowers.com/2009/01/16/friday-funfirst-day-of-schoolfive-years-from-now/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 16 Jan 2009 05:10:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>clarencestowers</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Current Affairs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Fun Stuff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Other Stuff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[President-Elect Obama]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[First Day of School&#8230;Five Years From Now


]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p class="dropcap-first"><strong>First Day of School&#8230;Five Years From Now</strong></p>
<div style="text-align:center;"><a href="http://www.clarencestowers.com/.a/6a00e55058c80e8833010536cbae21970b-pi"><img alt="Barack 5 Yrs" border="0" class="at-xid-6a00e55058c80e8833010536cbae21970b " src="http://www.clarencestowers.com/.a/6a00e55058c80e8833010536cbae21970b-800wi" title="Barack 5 Yrs" /></a></p>
</div>
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