Think of Roots, The Titanic, or The Book of Eli.

For that matter, think of their characters: LeVar Burton in Roots, Jack Dawson in The Titanic, or Denzel Washington in The Book of Eli.  What do they have in common?  All are GREAT stories and all GREAT stories and have a hero.  Additionally, their stories possess two key elements you should incorporate into your story:

1. A serious challenge
2. A hero dealing with challenges and learning something as a result

It’s easy to see why most stories fail.  Try this story from a typical church conference speaker:

My wife and I started this church in 19xx with a few people and a heart to win lost people to Jesus (they leave out the part where millionaire donors foot most of the bill).  Today, we are a thriving mega-church with 15 campuses and a $20 million budget.  We host conferences, trainings, and training resources to help you get to where we are (not stated – but implied).  We are #6 on Church Growth Today’s list of the fastest growing churches in America.

It’s an impressive story, but there’s a problem:

IT’S NOT A GOOD STORY &
IT HAS THE WRONG HERO!

If you want your friends, family, church members (pastors), colleagues, or clients to identify with your story, you must do what great story tellers do:

HELP THEM IDENTIFY WITH YOUR HERO!

Trust me: People won’t readily identify with you, your church, or your company/business for a simple reason:

YOU ARE NOT, AND NEVER CAN BE,
THEIR HERO!

Instead, they are their heroes.  People identify with themselves; they want solutions to their problems.  Unfortunately, they are not interested in helping you reach your goals.  Instead, they are interested in making their own lives better.

The ideal story talks about the person, not about you, your church (pastors), or your company/business.  It puts the listener in that hero’s shoes, and creates tension around some challenge that faced the hero.  Your best stories are not about you; they are about them.  Tell stories that make people the heroes and help them identify with them.  Then they will see how you can help them!  It’s a tough task, but, you can do it!

Did I challenge you to change your story?
If so, how?  If not, why?

How do you stand out in a world where people are OVERWHELMED?

Two ways: SIMPLIFY and CLARIFY!

Recently, I accompanied Shauntai (my wife) to the grocery store and was quickly overwhelmed with how many brands and types of toothpaste there were.  In the typical Target store, you confront rows of over sixty options, including pastes with whitener, tartar control, breath-freshening, baking powder, tube and pump, in over a dozen different brands (what ever happened to just plain ole Crest) .

Let’s be honest: We all FEEL overwhelmed. Our DVD players have more functions that we can learn.  When something goes wrong, few of us know what to do.

Additionally, we ARE overwhelmed. Everyone you deal with is overwhelmed.  Whatever you want to communicate to them, you must learn to do it simply and clearly.

The first rule in communication is:
Communicate so that you cannot be misunderstood.

Clarity inspires trust. We worry about the opposite: we fear that people we do not understand may be concealing something.  We suspect the confusion might be a smoke screen, intended to keep us from the truth.

Clarity inspires faith. We assume, as jurors assume when they hear expert witnesses, that a person who communicates clearly understands her subject.  I remember reading somewhere where a leading jury conslulting firm discovered that people regard “clarity” as the signal trait of a true expert!

Here’s The Point:
Make yourself clearer, and people will think you’re an expert.

What tips do you have to share that’ll help others to simplify and clarify their message/product/service?

How many times have you met someone and immediately formed a favorable or an unfavorable opinion about them?  Honestly, we’ve all made what I’d like to call, “snap-judgments.”  Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking is written by Malcolm Gladwell on how we make decisions about people (and many other things) without full knowledge.

The author describes the main subject of his book as “thin-slicing:” our ability to gauge what is really important from a very narrow period of experience.  In other words, spontaneous decisions are often as good as—or even better than—carefully planned and considered ones.   Gladwell explains how an expert’s ability to “thin slice” can be corrupted by their likes and dislikes, prejudices and stereotypes.

Whew, that was pretty heavy.
Take a deep breath…relax…are you still with me?

Here’s what Gladwell is saying:  People rarely make decisions as a product of long deliberation.  They make take weeks to announce a decision but often make the decision in minutes, perhaps seconds.

People do not gather data to make a decision;
they often gather it to JUSTIFY their decision!

They are not accumulating understanding; they are seeking comfort and support.  Most decisions are made, and then justified, rather than the other way around.

Therefore, that leads me to one obvious implication: “First impressions are really lasting impressions.”  The first impression, with startling frequency, is also the FINAL DECISION.

HERE’S THE POINT:
The first thing to plan for is your first impression.
Why, once a mind is made up, seldom does it change.

Has anyone judged you based on their first impression?

Have you ever judged someone based on your first impression?