How many times have you met someone and immediately formed a favorable or an unfavorable opinion about them? Honestly, we’ve all made what I’d like to call, “snap-judgments.” Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking is written by Malcolm Gladwell on how we make decisions about people (and many other things) without full knowledge.
The author describes the main subject of his book as “thin-slicing:” our ability to gauge what is really important from a very narrow period of experience. In other words, spontaneous decisions are often as good as—or even better than—carefully planned and considered ones. Gladwell explains how an expert’s ability to “thin slice” can be corrupted by their likes and dislikes, prejudices and stereotypes.
Whew, that was pretty heavy.
Take a deep breath…relax…are you still with me?
Here’s what Gladwell is saying: People rarely make decisions as a product of long deliberation. They make take weeks to announce a decision but often make the decision in minutes, perhaps seconds.
People do not gather data to make a decision;
they often gather it to JUSTIFY their decision!
They are not accumulating understanding; they are seeking comfort and support. Most decisions are made, and then justified, rather than the other way around.
Therefore, that leads me to one obvious implication: “First impressions are really lasting impressions.” The first impression, with startling frequency, is also the FINAL DECISION.
HERE’S THE POINT:
The first thing to plan for is your first impression.
Why, once a mind is made up, seldom does it change.
Has anyone judged you based on their first impression?
Have you ever judged someone based on your first impression?
Conventional wisdom says you need a mentor to help you get to where you desire to be. This conclusion, however, is based on a faulty assumption. The sources of this wisdom confused coincidence with a cause. No doubt many successful people have had mentors, but, knowing that doesn’t prove the person succeeded because of their mentors. For all we know, they might have succeeded in spite of them.
The reason that many successful people had mentors is that people destined to succeed ATTRACT all kings of people, including mentors. They attract mentors, fans, followers, and even HATERS. So the way to attract a mentor is to display those traits that will lead you to success anyway. Like begets like. Birds of a feather flock together. Will a mentor lead you there? Perhaps. Will one help you in some smaller way? No Doubt.
Here’s my advice: Don’t seek just ONE mentor. Instead, focus on doing the things that might attract people, including mentors. If you do find a mentor, make sure you include others. Remember, mentors are people, people are fallible, and even gifted doctors misdiagnose. Fortunately in many of those cases, the patient sought second and third opinions. YOU SHOULD TOO!
Having just one mentor is overrated;
having several is not.
What do you think? Do you agree or disagree?
FYI: I thinking about starting a mentoring group this Spring. If you are interested and live in the greater Chicago area—please email me (urban.pastor@gmail.com) and I will outline the details for you.
Our leaders met this past Thursday to discuss and discern what God would have us to do corporately regarding the tragedy that rocked Haiti. Although there are some conservative Christians labeling this as “God’s judgment,” we, however will take the high road & pray prayers bold enough to “WAKE… GOD UP.” Please click the link for more information & join us!
My late father, Dr. Clarence E. Stowers Sr., would always tell me, “Son, find a story and tell it well.” I didn’t quite understand then, but I do today! To steal one of the ancient slogans in advertising, “your brand is the truth about you, well told.” This year many resolved to make lasting changes and become the best version of themselves. I call it Version 2.0 – The me God wants me to be. In order to upgrade to Version 2.0, I encourage you to spend time pondering the following questions:
People all over the country are choosing to move their money out of bigger banks and into smaller, community-oriented financial institutions that generally avoided the reckless investments and schemes that helped cause the financial crisis.
Fueled by the personal initiatives of thousands, it’s a grassroots effort that has the potential to shift power in the financial system away from Wall Street and to Our Street. Keith Olbermann of MSNBC got behind the Move Your Money campaign on his show. He believes: “It’s time to make those Too Big To Fail banks just a little bit smaller by moving your money to a local credit union or community bank.”
Stephanie Frost decided that she had been mistreated at her big bank for too long and enough is enough — she’s switching to a small financial institution. She filmed herself going to close her account and posted the video to YouTube:
Dr. Reynaldo Anderson, my fraternity brother posed this question on Facebook: What would happen if churches got behind this movement? As I pondered that question, I estimate church goers give BILLIONS to their churches each year.
Additionally, I’m sure most of it is deposited into bailed-out banks – the same banks that refuse to lend to our members & their small businesses. Imagine what would happen if Protestants, Catholics (net worth estimated @ $1 trillion or more), & all other religions were to band together and MOVE OUR MONEY! I guarantee they’ll call us in for a congressional hearing.
Quick: Explain Sunday’s message in three sentences to your eight-year-old niece or nephew (scroll down to the end if want to see my explanation).
Why: The point here is to test your ability to communicate complex ideas in simple language.
In my opinion, the problem with preaching is that most preachers try to be deep instead of being effective. I know many preachers who are thrilled to spend precious time explaining the syntax and morphology of a word while people are one decision away from moral, financial, relational, & marital ruin.
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