by Clarence E. Stowers | Feb 2, 2010 | Communication, Empowerment, Leadership, Self-Leadership
Think of Roots, The Titanic, or The Book of Eli.
For that matter, think of their characters: LeVar Burton in Roots, Jack Dawson in The Titanic, or Denzel Washington in The Book of Eli. What do they have in common? All are GREAT stories and all GREAT stories and have a hero. Additionally, their stories possess two key elements you should incorporate into your story:
- A serious challenge
- A hero dealing with challenges and learning something as a result
It’s easy to see why most stories fail. Try this story from a typical church conference speaker:
My wife and I started this church in 19xx with a few people and a heart to win lost people to Jesus (they leave out the part where millionaire donors foot most of the bill). Today, we are a thriving mega-church with 15 campuses and a $20 million budget. We host conferences, trainings, and training resources to help you get to where we are (not stated – but implied). We are #6 on Church Growth Today’s list of the fastest growing churches in America.
It’s an impressive story, but there’s a problem:
IT’S NOT A GOOD STORY &
IT HAS THE WRONG HERO!
If you want your friends, family, church members (pastors), colleagues, or clients to identify with your story, you must do what great story tellers do:
HELP THEM IDENTIFY WITH YOUR HERO!
Trust me: People won’t readily identify with you, your church, or your company/business for a simple reason:
YOU ARE NOT, AND NEVER CAN BE,
THEIR HERO!
Instead, they are their heroes. People identify with themselves; they want solutions to their problems. Unfortunately, they are not interested in helping you reach your goals. Instead, they are interested in making their own lives better.
The ideal story talks about the person, not about you, your church (pastors), or your company/business. It puts the listener in that hero’s shoes, and creates tension around some challenge that faced the hero. Your best stories are not about you; they are about them. Tell stories that make people the heroes and help them identify with them. Then they will see how you can help them! It’s a tough task, but, you can do it!
Did I challenge you to change your story?
If so, how? If not, why?
by Clarence E. Stowers | Jan 29, 2010 | Empowerment, Self-Leadership, Success
What makes people like Michael Jordan, Tiger Woods, and Lance Armstrong so great?
We think we know: Each was a natural who came into the world with a gift for doing exactly what he ended up doing. Guess what, I found the secret to their success and because I want you to succeed, I’m ready to share my discovery with the entire world. I’m about the let you in on a secret that has the potential to revolutionize your life!
Shhhh…Lean Closer….
Here it is:
THERE ARE NO SHORTCUTS TO SUCCESS. PERIOD!
Nobody is great without hard work!
Researchers have identified what they call the ten-year rule when it comes to becoming a world-class performer. In 2006, Fortune Magazine published, “What It Takes to be Great” which coined the phrase “Performance Principle.” The Performance Principle says that it takes a long time to be an overnight success. Furthermore, the author goes on to say, “Even the most accomplished people need around ten years of hard work before becoming world-class…” This pattern is so well established researchers call it the ten-year rule. In short, what they and others have discovered: There are not shortcuts!
The best people in any field are those who devote the most hours to what the researchers call “deliberate practice.” It’s activity that’s explicitly intended to improve performance, that reaches for objectives just beyond one’s level of competence, provides feedback on results and involves high levels of repetition.
Fortune magazine gives this example:
Simply hitting a bucket of balls is not deliberate practice, which is why most golfers don’t get better. Hitting an eight-iron 300 times with a goal of leaving the ball within 20 feet of the pin 80 percent of the time, continually observing results and making appropriate adjustments, and doing that for hours every day – that’s deliberate practice.
Have you ever been tempted to take shortcuts? Did you? What were the results?
by Clarence E. Stowers | Jan 27, 2010 | Communication, Empowerment, Leadership, Networking, Preaching, Self-Leadership
How do you stand out in a world where people are OVERWHELMED?
Two ways: SIMPLIFY and CLARIFY!
Recently, I accompanied Shauntai (my wife) to the grocery store and was quickly overwhelmed with how many brands and types of toothpaste there were. In the typical Target store, you confront rows of over sixty options, including pastes with whitener, tartar control, breath-freshening, baking powder, tube and pump, in over a dozen different brands (what ever happened to just plain ole Crest) .
Let’s be honest: We all FEEL overwhelmed. Our DVD players have more functions that we can learn. When something goes wrong, few of us know what to do.
Additionally, we ARE overwhelmed. Everyone you deal with is overwhelmed. Whatever you want to communicate to them, you must learn to do it simply and clearly.
The first rule in communication is:
Communicate so that you cannot be misunderstood.
Clarity inspires trust. We worry about the opposite: we fear that people we do not understand may be concealing something. We suspect the confusion might be a smoke screen, intended to keep us from the truth.
Clarity inspires faith. We assume, as jurors assume when they hear expert witnesses, that a person who communicates clearly understands her subject. I remember reading somewhere where a leading jury conslulting firm discovered that people regard “clarity” as the signal trait of a true expert!
Here’s The Point:
Make yourself clearer, and people will think you’re an expert.
What tips do you have to share that’ll help others to simplify and clarify their message/product/service?
by Clarence E. Stowers | Jan 25, 2010 | Book Reviews, Communication, Decisions, Empowerment, Leadership, Self-Leadership, Success
How many times have you met someone and immediately formed a favorable or an unfavorable opinion about them? Honestly, we’ve all made what I’d like to call, “snap-judgments.” Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking is written by Malcolm Gladwell on how we make decisions about people (and many other things) without full knowledge.
The author describes the main subject of his book as “thin-slicing:” our ability to gauge what is really important from a very narrow period of experience. In other words, spontaneous decisions are often as good as—or even better than—carefully planned and considered ones. Gladwell explains how an expert’s ability to “thin slice” can be corrupted by their likes and dislikes, prejudices and stereotypes.
Whew, that was pretty heavy.
Take a deep breath…relax…are you still with me?
Here’s what Gladwell is saying: People rarely make decisions as a product of long deliberation. They make take weeks to announce a decision but often make the decision in minutes, perhaps seconds.
People do not gather data to make a decision;
they often gather it to JUSTIFY their decision!
They are not accumulating understanding; they are seeking comfort and support. Most decisions are made, and then justified, rather than the other way around.
Therefore, that leads me to one obvious implication: “First impressions are really lasting impressions.” The first impression, with startling frequency, is also the FINAL DECISION.
HERE’S THE POINT:
The first thing to plan for is your first impression.
Why, once a mind is made up, seldom does it change.
Has anyone judged you based on their first impression?
Have you ever judged someone based on your first impression?
by Clarence E. Stowers | Jan 13, 2010 | Decisions, Empowerment, Goals, Self-Leadership
Here’s a fact: Those who are comfortable with the status quo do not grow!
This is because remaining in a comfort zone encourages people to do the BARE MINIMUM. Thus, their only goal is to keep things the same way they’ve always been. To become successful (according to your predetermined standards of success) you must be willing to push yourself outside your safety zone over and over again. In other words, you must plan to escape from the “Prison of Comfort.”
Realize that your comfort zone is holding you back – then step outside of it!
Pushing your limits is like stretching your body. You will know it’s working when you start to feel uncomfortable. When you feel that twinge, be assured that you are inching your way closer to your ultimate goal. Let this be the year you decide to break free from the “Prison of Comfort.” I know you may be afraid, but, I’m encouraging you to be bold and courageous. I once heard someone say, “Courage is not the absence of fear; It’s moving ahead in spite of your fears.”
What would you do if you knew for sure that you would not fail?
