Should I Follow My Head or My Heart: 5 Questions to Ask Before Making Decisions

Should I Follow My Head or My Heart: 5 Questions to Ask Before Making Decisions

I fondly remember my children agonizing over which college they would attend. We created spreadsheets, lists of pros and cons, prayed, and even burned candles while wearing sackcloth and ashes (just kidding).

Let’s face it; making significant decisions is not easy. It’s exhausting.

For those struggling with making decisions, how do you know when you’re listening to your heart or you’re listening to your head?  

Let’s face it; decisions are emotionally painful.

The word decision is of Latin origin. It means to cut away from the past.

If you’re married, it means cutting away from being single.

If you have made people (children), it means cutting away sleeping.

If you are a business owner, it means cutting away from security. 

That’s why most decisions are painful.

To make a decision, we have to confront our fears and doubts head-on. When making decisions, we often think in black and white terms: right or wrong, good or bad. But the truth is, most decisions are neither right nor wrong. They’re simply choices. And the more critical the choice, the more difficult it is to make.What happens when the battle within you is between what your heart believes and your brain dictates and what your inner wisdom tells you? So this is a question about whether you make decisions with your heart or head, and how do you know?

Before the pandemic, I made the majority of my decisions with my head. I logically weighed pros and cons, considered others’ opinions, and made choices that I thought were wise. I now realize that this habit caused me to miss out on joy and happiness.

For example, before the pandemic, I would have never considered taking a spontaneous trip with my family or friends. I would have thought about all potential risks and what could go wrong. Now, I know that those types of trips bring me a lot of happiness, and I’m more likely to take them because my heart is telling me that the risks are worth it.

Why? Time is a non-renewable resource. Once lost, it’s lost forever.

When you make decisions with your head, you’re usually trying to avoid pain or gain something. You want to be safe, and you want what you believe is the best outcome. However, when you make decisions with your heart, you often look for something different. Something that might be a little risky, but that has the potential to make you happier.

Today, I trust my instincts and emotions more than my intellect. 

You can analyze the fine print and contracts using your head. But when it comes to making a decision, look inwardly and check it against your heart and soul. 

So, how do you do that? 

According to Mel Robbins, here are five questions to ask when making decisions.

5 Questions to Ask When Making Decisions

1. Is the decision you’re about to make help you develop your future or expand your life’s possibilities? If it’s a yes, then no matter how terrible it seems, the decision is a yes.
2. Will this decision restrict, inhibit, or silence you? If so, the answer is no. No matter how easy the decision is, no matter how safe that decision is. The answer is no.
3. Will this decision expand or limit my voice?
4. Will this decision open the door to new possibilities or build a wall that prevents progress?
5. Does it raise my voice, or does it silence me?

Remember, there’s always a short-term and a long-term impact of the decision.

When making a decision, it’s essential to think about that decision’s short-term and long-term impacts. The short-term consequences are the things that happen immediately after the decision. The long-term effects are the things that happen down the road, sometimes many years after the decision is made.

It’s essential to think about both of these impacts when deciding because they can be very different. The short-term effect might be exciting or seem like a good idea at the time, but the long-term implications might be very different. It’s crucial to weigh all of the pros and cons of a decision before making it, so you can be sure that you’re making the right choice.

Do you agree or disagree?

I’d love to hear how you make decisions?