by Clarence E. Stowers | Oct 8, 2008 | Communication, Relationships
Today’s women have achieved more than their great grandmothers could have ever imagined. Women are in politics, women are in space; women are excelling in every career imaginable. Women today are strong & independent.
Despite the females social evolution, however, you may be surprised to learn that women actually still enjoy being treated like women, and they still appreciate a little chivalry now and then.
HERE'S MY "TOP 5" OF WHAT "MY" WOMAN WANTS FROM ME
SHE LOVES IT WHEN I KISS HER FOR NO REASON WHILE HOLDING HER HAND
My woman "still" enjoys a nice, deep kiss that doesn’t have any strings attached. This serves two purposes: It lets her indulge in kissing for the sheer pleasure of it, and it also tells her I want her, and not just sex. Sometimes she needs a different type of connection.
HERE'S A TIP:
Try a surprise kiss for no reason at all; she’ll love you for it. Combine this with a little hand-holding and she’ll be smiling for days.
SHE LOVES IT WHEN I DANCE WITH HER
Simply put, dancing with a woman makes her feel special. Unfortunately, most men are reluctant to put their dancing shoes on, especially in a public setting. Guess what? While she’d probably welcome the idea, you don’t need to visit a nightclub to dance with your woman. She’ll be just as thrilled if you slipped a little Marvin Gaye on and danced with her in the living room. This would actually be to your advantage, as you have total control over the music.
SHE LOVES IT WHEN I DRESS UP FOR HER
Dressing up to take your woman out is an excellent way to impress her. It’s not about the clothes; it’s about the fact that you find her worth dressing up for. It lets her know that you think she’s worth that kind of effort. You may feel overdressed, but your hotness factor will have magnified exponentially. It’s true what they say: Women really do love a sharp-dressed man.
SHE LOVES IT WHEN I REMEMBER RANDOM MILESTONES
As a rule, birthdays and anniversaries should always be remembered; forgetting something of this magnitude will send the message that I don’t find her terribly important. After all, she memorized mine early on in the relationship, so if hers goes unnoticed, she’ll be utterly heartbroken.
To truly impress her, I aim to remember the insignificant dates, as well as the big ones. The first time I told her you loved her, the first time we kissed, the first place we vacationed together, what she was wearing the first time we met — any one of these turns her to jelly and score me more bonus points.
SHE LOVES IT WHEN WE DO ACTIVITIES TOGETHER
I've learned what women want from men is to spend time with their man outside of the bedroom. They want to experience life with their man, and this is one of the best ways to develop a three-dimensional relationship.
Join her in activities both of you can enjoy. If neither of you are the sporty type, try something else that you already excel at. When I taught my wife how to hold a pool stick & shoot pool – she loved the personalized attention.
Anyone like to comment or add to my list?
by Clarence E. Stowers | Jun 30, 2008 | Bible Journey, Christian, Christianity, Church Issues, Communication, Family
I would like for you all to say hello to my guest blogger Chandra Ivy-Oliver. Along with others, she took the challenge to offer practical steps to help others struggling with revenge.
Dr. David Hawkins, author of ‘Dealing With the Crazy Makers in Your Life’ says “People come in all shapes and sizes. I have no problem with that. However, when these people are in my life, and they are bona fide, dyed in the wool, Certifiable Crazy Makers, I’m no longer as friendly or hospitable. Click here to read the how he deals with these people.
Dr. David Hawkins
The Relationship Doctor
Chandra’s Response to What if its family that keeps hurting you?
I believe in giving chances, not just a second chance, but chances. God had given us chance after chance when we hurt or do wrong, because I know he has done it for me. But I would start off by telling the person that is doing the hurt, how they act or react is hurting your relationship. The person doing the hurt will always blame it on you, not because it’s really your fault, but because you are the reasonable and considerate person trying to make thing right or easier.
Ex: It’s just like having a toddler with a tantrum, you keep giving in and he or she will keep acting out. Family can be the same way, there is that one person who keeps hurting you, but they only do it in public where they can front on you, then when your home or on the phone, they apologize and want forgiveness. And you accept the apology, because you want to be like Christ and forgive. If it keeps happening you need to talk to God, remain prayerful, calm, firm and clear. Reading your Bible while dealing with this hurt. Colossians 3: 8-25 helps you clearly understand.
Thanks Chandra, you hit the nail on the head!
by Clarence E. Stowers | Jun 30, 2008 | Bible Journey, Christian, Christianity, Communication, Relationships
I would like for you all to say hello to my guest blogger Falana Coleman-Zamora. Along with others, she took the challenge to offer practical steps to help others struggling with revenge.
The Questions:
What if its family that keeps hurting you?
What should you do when your friends continue to “pull the scab” off a hurt that you have forgiven?
Falana’s Response:
“I believe in healthy confrontation. I thinks it’s perfectly appropriate to communicate to friends and loved ones that their behaviors are negatively impacting us. I have found that more times than not they have no idea that their behavior or repeated remarks about the past hurt others. (It’s amazing how self involved humans have managed to become.) If we openly communicate with one another I believe that true healing can begin for all parties involved.”
Nicely done Falana!
Pastor Stowers
by Clarence E. Stowers | Apr 16, 2008 | Books, Communication, Empowerment, Leadership, Vision
Currently, I’m reading a new book entitled The Missional Leader by Alan Roxburgh, and boy is it GREAT! I’m willing to suggest this may be one of the best books I’ve read (so far) regarding leadership and change.
Thinking about initiating a wide-scale change/transition initiative
in your church or organization? Here are a couple of questions worth
asking before you dive in…
- Are we STRUCTURED for change?
Is your church or organization structured in a way that will allow the
RIGHT PEOPLE to lead and make decisions? If not – do not proceed past GO….do NOT collect $200!
First things first!!
If you’re not structured for change, it doesn’t matter how passionate or
committed you might be to it – there will always be a chance that the
wrong people could step in to infiltrate, hijack, or sabotage the transition.
- Am I COMMITTED to change?
Perhaps the question should be…. "Am I committed to change – NO MATTER WHAT THE COST?"
Am I willing to lose people? Lose money? Lose popularity? Lose friendships? Maybe even lose buildings?
Listen to me……..TRUE CHANGE is COSTLY! There will be a cost! And it will be painful. It will be felt.
There will be scars and bruises.
Are you up for it?
Consider that question! Because if you’re NOT fully, 100%
committed, you better think twice before diving in – for YOUR sake AND
for the sake of those who will believe in your vision and stand by
you.
by Clarence E. Stowers | Apr 10, 2008 | Communication, Current Affairs, Empowerment, Race
In the black community in America,
there is a severe disconnection among those of different classes.
Many upper and middle-class blacks feel
as if they can look down on, talk down to, and overlook black people
who are considered lower class. Unfortunately, I’ve witnessed black
people who are college-educated, living in nice homes, driving fancy
cars or earning a high salaries, looking down on blacks who are less
fortunate. Lawrence Otis Graham even wrote a book explaining why
upper-class blacks want nothing to do with other blacks. They only
want to deal with “Their Kind of People.”
Why is it that
some blacks who have "moved on up," by working hard and
achieving the American dream feel they can distance themselves and
underestimate poor black people? Is it because they feel they have
nothing in common with lower class black people? Is it because they
feel they are more accepted among white people?
Perhaps it is
because lower class blacks get blamed for many of the problems the
black community allegedly has, such as speaking poor English; having
babies outside of wedlock; high dropout rates; using and selling
drugs; and filling up the jail cells.
Is it because they
feel like they are more accepted among white people? Or are they
just outright silly, feeling as if they have arrived?
The last
time I checked I thought most of the black people in America were
descendants of slaves. With that being the case, we all come from
nothing. They make brainless statements like low class blacks are
not good enough to associate or be seen with. They even have a
website devoted to “stuff educated black people like.”
Some
are so confused. They go as far as talking bad about them in front
of whites. They are not willing to try and take the time out to help
or share information that will help the lower class blacks get to
their level. They don’t attend black schools, and they move away
from predominantly black neighborhoods.
That is not to say
that all black neighborhoods have lower class black people living in
them, but a lot of blacks have forgotten who they are and where they
come from.
Black people are not in any position to look down
on one another. We as black people haven’t risen to our full
potential. Even rich black people are not globally in control of as
much as they could. They are rich, but they have to be careful what
they do or say because if they make the wrong move all of their money
can be taken away in the blink of an eye. High and middle-class
black people who are walking around feeling as if they are in a
position to look down on others need to wake up and smell the coffee.
In my opinion, the divide is created by
the monopoly capitalist economic system and social structure which
gives rise to and reinforces class divisions within the society.
Hence, classism is the effect, not the cause. Trust me, at the end
of the day, we are all the same.
by Clarence E. Stowers | Apr 4, 2008 | Christian, Christianity, Church Issues, Communication, Current Affairs, Empowerment, Family, Race, Religion, Vision, Worship
Next week I’m starting a new blog series entitled: "Ten Challenges Facing African Americans & What You Can Do." Trust me, I will hold no punches and exercise my 1st Amendment right.
Will I offend some, YES…
Will I spark debate…YES
Will you disagree…MAYBE
Will you engage…I HOPE SO
Will I cuss…STAY TUNED 😀
Will you comment…I PRAY THAT YOU DO
Stay tuned…Spread the word…Can’t wait till Monday…
