by Clarence E. Stowers | Apr 15, 2015 | Empowerment, Goals, Leadership, Self-Leadership, Vision
When is enough…enough?
Recently, I asked several people to explain to me exactly what they wanted. Guess what – NOT A SINGLE person could answer. Knowing what you want is the best way to avoid the temptation to pursue several things at the same time. That takes focus.
I’ve seen people get frustrated by their ministry, business, and careers because they know that they want something but they don’t exactly know what. The main reason people struggle professionally and personally is simply a lack of focus. This lack of focus can be costly because there is a subtle push to pursue more.
There Will Always Be a Subtle Push to Pursue More
There’s a subtle and (if you’re not careful) sinister push that we should devote more time to building our brand/platform. Although I’m a pastor, a writer, mentor, and speaker, I’m not exempt from this subtle push. A few years ago I discovered that there was a danger to my soul in pursuing more exposure, more name recognition, more money to be made from thinking, writing, and speaking about ministry issues. If you’re not careful, you’ll end up like King Solomon and lose focus.
King Solomon’s Dangerous Pursuit of More
King Solomon wrote an entire book (Ecclesiastes) on perilous pursuits and eventually paid a hefty price. He lost focus and desperately pursued several unrelated goals in a vain attempt to satisfy himself (Ecclesiastes 2:1–11). As Solomon penned these words, he was rich beyond measure, but internally empty.
He couldn’t fill the hole God placed in his heart with things or understand why he lacked contentment. Regretfully, he tried to fill that hole with his outward pursuits of more. Solomon eventually did narrow his focus, but it took him a lifetime and an entire book to do so (read Ecclesiastes. 12).
Solomon finally determined what really mattered and what he really wanted. I read somewhere: “If you chase two rabbits, both will escape.” The danger with pursuing more is that it’s limitless. Unlike Solomon, Jesus models what happens when you’re focused.
Jesus Was Focused – He Didn’t Allow Distractions or Rejection Change His Focus
While in the synagogue, Jesus spoke from Isaiah 61 about His anointing (Luke 4:18). His cruel rejection by the people of his hometown in Nazareth is highlighted to characterize Jesus’ initial teaching ministry in Galilee. Even when His audience didn’t like what He had to say (Luke 4:28, 29), He moved on to the next town to continue His work. He would not let anything drain His anointing or distract Him from His mission.
The Most Effective Tactic I Use to Stay Focused
Schedule time on your calendar to focus on the task.
After reading Jason Fried‘s book Rework, I’ve incorporated the “Alone Zone” into my work flow. If some asks if I am available, I reply, “I’m sorry, but I have another commitment at that time.”
Jesus was focused. How about you? Have you figured out what you want?
by Clarence E. Stowers | Mar 24, 2015 | Christian, Christianity, Encouragement, Fasting, Goals, Self-Leadership, Spiritual Growth
Have you ever wondered what’s the real reason you’re not as far as you’d like to be spiritually?
We blame it on the enemy, our busy lives, our careers, children, even the church we attend. The real reason you’re not as far as you’d like to be spiritually isn’t because of the enemy, busyness, or the complexity of sermons; it’s because we’re distracted. Despite knowing that distractions hamper productivity, most people don’t realize how it affects their spiritual growth.
In the few minutes it takes to read this blog post, chances are you’ll pause to check your phone, answer a text, switch to your desktop to read an email, or glance at the Facebook or Twitter messages popping up in the corner of your screen. And pastors wonder why it is people are not growing spiritually. They’re distracted!
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by Clarence E. Stowers | Mar 12, 2015 | Accountability, Empowerment, Encouragement, Goals, Motivation, Self-Leadership
As a father, one of the most important things I have learned is that life is not fair.
Life does not always deliver equal portions to everyone. When my sons were younger, I remember trying to split a Baby Ruth candy bar in equal parts. Joshua, my youngest, began protesting because, in his opinion, his older brother had more peanuts. The first thing that came out of his mouth: “NOT FAIR! He has more peanuts than I do.”
That is exactly how life is. It is not divided into equal portions and that is when we scream: “Life is not fair!” Sometimes our portion of life does not seem right. Consequently, we are disappointed, angry, and if we are not careful, we become bitter. Bitterness is often a by-product of finding yourself stressed to your breaking point. All of us can recall moments of unfairness. We find ourselves saying “this should not be happening to me.”
The fact is, you are going to experience pain in life through circumstances, from other people, sometimes intentionally, and sometimes unintentionally. You cannot keep yourself from painful moments. Although you cannot control your circumstances, you can control your response, your reaction, and how you choose to react to a particular circumstance or person that has hurt you. How do you respond when life is not fair?
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by Clarence E. Stowers | Mar 6, 2015 | Christian, Christianity, Decisions, Empowerment, Encouragement, Goals, Motivation, Self-Leadership
A few months ago, I flew to Orange County, CA. On my return flight, I experienced turbulence somewhere over the Colorado Rockies. Sensing my nervousness, my seat mate looked at me and said, “Do not be worried, if it is your time, it is your time.” Really? You mean to tell me that is the best thing you can say?
He gave me absolutely no comfort! I have never received comfort from people who say, “If it is your time, it is your time.” It does not matter if you are in a car, or on a bus or plane, if it is your time, it is your time. What if it is the pilot’s time? It may not be my time but it is the pilot’s time. The truth is, at some point, we all worry.
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by Clarence E. Stowers | Feb 25, 2015 | Family, Fun Stuff, Goals, Motivation, Personal
Dear Son,
Today you become a man. Becoming a man is more than reaching a milestone. It’s a process that began on that day eighteen years ago when you took your first breath and will continue until that time in the future when you take your last.
Being a man is not about accomplishments, athletic ability, academic ability or pursing popularity, power, possession, or prestige. Being a man is more about character, compassion and courage.
A man has character when he is a person of integrity who can be depended on. A man has compassion when he not only cares for others, but demonstrates it by putting their best interests ahead of his own.
A man has courage when he does what is right even what it’s difficult. I believe you are a long way along this journey to becoming a man. You have learned so much already. You show so much promise. As you journey into manhood, I’d like to share my experiences and help you go further faster.
- Be proud of who you are. You are a Stowers and we determine our values, why they’re important, and live them out. Don’t be afraid to be an individual. Own it!
- Listen more than you speak. You will learn more by paying attention to what others have to say, and people appreciate being heard.
- Add value to people’s lives. Look for ways to inspire and empower others. Look for simple ways to help others.
- Stand on your word. Doing what you say you will do is a rare thing in our world today. It is one of the easiest ways to stand apart.
- Be confident but stay hungry and humble. You can accomplish anything you put your mind to, so don’t doubt your abilities. On the other hand don’t think too highly of yourself. Never get too high or too low.
- Keep grinding. The process of working toward a goal is often as rewarding as the achievement itself.
- Intelligence and wisdom are not the same. Intelligence is the ability to learn. Wisdom is using knowledge and experience to make good choices. You can be both.
- Never stop learning and growing. There’s a whole world to be explored beyond the classroom long after graduation.
- Own “IT.” Whatever life throws at you, embrace. Change, obstacles, accomplishments, difficulties, adventures, success, failure are all opportunities to grow. Enjoy the moment.
- Love God and people! Be a man who is known by his affections and his actions. Value your family and forge friendships that last.
These eighteen years you have been alive also happen to coincide with the best eighteen years of my life. That’s no coincidence. Your coming into this world has profoundly changed mine. No words can adequately describe my love, my pride and my hope for you. I am blessed to call you my son. And today I am also pleased to call you a man. Happy 18th Birthday Son! I love you man!
Your father & life coach 😀
by Clarence E. Stowers | Feb 23, 2015 | Empowerment, Encouragement, Goals, Self-Leadership, Success
Google is amazing. Some love it. Some hate it.
I confess: Google is my trump card when I need to know something really fast. Recently, I searched “top skills you need to be successful” and I was blown away. I quickly discovered:
- Everyone has their own definition of success
- Everyone has their own list on what it takes to be successful
- Most results centered on power, prestige, possessions, and popularity
- Now I understand why we are confused
How would you define success? A lot of my Google search results considers power, possessions, prosperity, and prestige to be the highest of goals. It is true…God blesses some people with positions of power or wealth.
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