Setbacks are disheartening. They can leave us feeling disempowered and discouraged. Mostly setbacks can leave us feeling as though we have no real control over our lives. Yet there are some people who are successful despite the challenges and setbacks they experience. What is their secret?
Setbacks Help You Gain Perspective
Successful people view setbacks different. The difference is that they have a different perspective on setbacks. While they realize that they can’t always control the world around them, they can control how they respond to circumstances. In other words, successful people use setbacks to gain perspective when they experience circumstances beyond their control. They see setbacks as an opportunity to REFOCUS and find an EVEN BETTER WAY to achieve their goals. Setbacks don’t stop them, they simply slow them down for a short period of time.
“If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not you’ll find an excuse.” – Unknown
On Christmas Day, I took my family to see Selma. It was an entertaining movie, but being a Martin Luther King, Jr. fanatic, I did not recognize many of the speeches presented in the movie. Why? In 2009, the King Estate licensed his speeches to DreamWorks and Warner Bros. (along with the rights to his life).
Because King’s speeches are licensed to another project, Selma’s filmmakers had to find a way to re-create the meaning of MLK’s words without plagiarizing. That means they had to rewrite MLK’s words. The film skirts close to MLK’s words without using them.
One of the most memorable scenes occurs when Martin Luther King, Jr., while preaching to the congregation, explains why equal voting rights are crucial. He rallies them to stand up for their rights and sparks a movement that would change the world.
It is unacceptable that they use their power to keep us voiceless. As long as I am unable to use my constitutional right to vote, I do not have command of my own life. I cannot determine my own destiny. For it is determined for me by people who would rather see me suffer than succeed. Those that have gone before us say, ‘no more! No more!’ That means protest. That means march. That means disturb the peace. That means jail. That means risk. And that is hard. We will not wait any longer. Give us the vote. We’re not asking. We’re demanding. Give us the vote! Martin Luther King, Jr.
Happy Birthday frat! You stood tall among giants and I am because of you!
We all experience some despair when setbacks occur. That’s quite normal.
It is one thing to rejoice, give thanks and praise when things go right. But it’s not as easy when things go wrong. A couple of weeks ago, I shared how emotions can paralyze you and keep you from moving towards recovery.
It’s important to take time to reflect, even grieve so that you can move on. The important thing is that taking the time to deal with your emotions is the first step. The problem is that too often people get stuck in that emotional state. Instead of merely reflecting and then moving on they get stuck there. You can read Part 1 HERE.
What most people don’t realize is that rejoicing is a very deliberate step on the road to recovery from setbacks. “What’s there to rejoice about?” you grumble. If you think about it there’s lots to be grateful for. (more…)
Saying no is among the most useful skills you can possess, especially as it pertains to pursuing and living an abundant life.
Saying no to unnecessary distractions allows you to concentrate on what is important to you. And saying no to temptation helps you accomplish your goals and stay on track. So how do you do it?
It is not easy to accept that things haven’t worked out as planned.
So how do you deal with it? To start, it’s okay to take some time to deal with the disappointment. Whether we like to admit it or not we are all emotional beings. We all experience some despair when setbacks occur. That’s quite normal.
Take some time to reflect, even grieve so that you can move on. The important thing is that taking the time to deal with your emotions is the first step. And step implies that you are moving forward, not staying where you are.
The problem is that too often people get stuck in that emotional state. Instead of merely reflecting and then moving on they get stuck there. They stew over the fact that things haven’t worked out. They focus on what hasn’t happened, what has been lost instead of trying to move forward. When you get stuck here that’s when bitterness sets in. Bitterness is easy. It doesn’t require thought, movement or progress. It just requires you to sit and stew. (more…)
Why do so many people reach success and then fail?
“One of the big reasons is, we think success is a one-way street. So we do everything that leads up to success, but then we get there. We figure we’ve made it, we sit back in our comfort zone, and we actually stop doing everything that made us successful,” according to Richard St. John.
In this TED talk, Richard St. John reminds us that success is not a one-way street, but a constant journey. He uses the story of his business’ rise and fall to illustrate a valuable lesson — when we stop trying, we fail. Check it out!
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Clarence E. Stowers, Jr.
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